


and im ready (to power through it)

by Graphiteandhumanity



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Light Angst, Reggie peters is autistic (Julie and the Phantoms), Soft Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 07:33:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28631811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Graphiteandhumanity/pseuds/Graphiteandhumanity
Summary: Julie's still grieving, and thoughts of her Mom find their way into every part of her life.She's let music back in, she's got her band, her family, so why can't she just feel better?Reggie may not be an expert at feelings, but he's a better listener, cuddler, and friend than Julie could ever ask for.
Relationships: Julie Molina & Reggie Peters
Comments: 2
Kudos: 61





	and im ready (to power through it)

She just wants to curl up and cry and scream about how unfair life is, for someone else to help her figure out why she's not happy, when everything's okay now. Even if it wasn't before.  
She just wants Luke, he gets it in the way that someone whose lived through the same feelings, in an entirely different situation, gets it.

And even if he can't fix it, can't fix her, he can touch her now. Which means he can hold her close while she curls up and screams and cries about how much she wishes it could be her mom holding her right now.

Luke's not a place holder, but he does fill in a few gaps.

With the thoughts of venting and cuddling in the front of her mind, keeping the harder parts at bay, she swings open the garage doors.

To an empty room.

She clenches her fist. School was bad but not terrible, she performed in class and it was standard. She went to lunch and it was pizza day, so not great but not the worst, she listened to music on the bus and thought of a few new lyrics, ones her mum would have loved.  
She spiralled.  
And now she's standing in front of a garage, her boys not here, instead of Luke's safe arms she finds empty couches and abandoned instruments.

Her breath hitches, and her day goes from eh, eh, bad, to worse.

She does as she planned, she curls up on the couch and let's the tears fall.

She misses her, she wants him, she wants someone to make her feel like the light isnt fading again.

"Julie?" The voice is soft and hesitant and so totally caring that she almost cries harder, even as Reggie appears in front of the couch with a poof.

She stares at his knees as she tries to process the fact she isn't alone.

"Reg?" Her hand reaches for him without her say so, and it's unsurprising when he instinctively steps out of reach.

Oh. She really needs to pull herself out of this mess, she needs to stop wallowing.

"No it's, it's ok," he steps closer and grabs her hand from where she'd tucked it back against her chest, and sits on the floor facing her balled up form.

"Ok?" He gazes at their interconnected hands, as his free fingers drum a rhythm into his thigh.

She sniffles. "No."

He squeezes, and she lets out a terse breath.  
Reggie and her are friends, close like siblings even, bit they've never been particularly... Feely, together, in the emotional sense.

They've had plenty of post performance hugs, and band couch cuddle sessions. They've even held hands while watching movies, and Reggie spends more time playing with her bracelet collection than she does, but none of that involves much opening up. Not the way she thinks she's about to.

"I just, miss her y'know?" The feelings she'd been holding back since she thought of those words on the bus come flooding out, and Reggie's understanding him has her choking on her next words.

"I feel like I should be ok by now, I've got so much, I've done so much. My music," she cuts herself off with a pitiful whine.

Another supportive hum, his eyes drilling holes in their clasped hands.

She takes a steadying breath.  
"My music, when it came back it was supposed to make it better, make me better. I thought it had, so why do I still feel like this?"

Shrug.  
Hum.  
Squeeze.

"I just," she screws her eyes shut against the wave of sadness threatening to overwhelm her, "just want it to be good again." She rolls onto her back, bringing their hands to lay together on her stomach as she stares at the garage roof.

"Want it to be good again?"  
It's a prompt, a hook to get her to open back up, to let him help her. And she lets it work.

"Life, I guess. It's better, but I don't know if it'll ever be as good as it was with her in it. I'm scared I'll never be that happy again."

He tugs on her hand til she looks back at him, sniffling as he wipes the salty tears from her cheeks.

"Julie, your life still has her in it," he motions around, at the rainbows formed by the refracted light of the glass wind chimes that belonged to her Mom. They sparkle against the potted plants her Mom used to sneak into the garage past her dad because he thought she had too many already. The chimes spin and light up the shiny top of Julie's Mom's piano.

"You've still got her."

She pulls in a sharp breath, and throws herself towards Reggie, stopping just before she draws him into her arms, their hands still clasped between them.

Tears clouding her vision, she kneels in front of him and stares into her face, "Thank you."

He does a small but genuine smile, and let's go of her hand only to engulf her in the hug she obviously wanted. Julie sinks into the embrace, the aching feeling in her chest of missing her mother is gently overpowered by feelings of love and warmth and caring. 

He's filling in some gaps.

They sit like this together until Julie's knees begin to feel sore and she's certain she'll need to pop every joint in her body to get them working again, but Reggie doesn't complain.

He just sits, one hand pulled her close around her waist, the other lightly threaded through the baby hairs at the base of her neck, his own forehead resting on her shoulder.

Julie pulls back, and offers him a soft smile before rubbing her swollen eyes with the back of her hand.

"Thank you, truly, it means a lot to me man," she rides from their spot on the floor, offering him a hand and using it to pull them both onto the couch behind her.

He smiles back, and shuffles his hand through his mussed hair, the other tapping the rhythm onto his thigh once again, faster this time. It's a companiable silence, and the warmth of Reggie beside her keeps her grounded in the comfort of his earlier point, she's still all around.

Calmer then before, but now exhausted, she clicks the tv on with the remote beside her, and absently watches as the characters on screen have a fight about whether it's what's-her-name's or what's-his-name's fault that the dog got out.

Lazily, she leans into the back of the couch, and flings her bracelet clad arm into Reggie's lap. He glanced up, smiles, and gets to work sorting them in system she's yet to work out.

A while later, after she's flicked the channel over atleast three times and has landed on a cartoon, theres the unmistakable sound of two teenage boy sized patches of missplaced air. 

"You guys will never believe this suck-", Luke startles to a stop, taking note of the blotchiness of Julie's face and the redness of her eyes.

"Woah," Alex says, "you okay Jules?"  
He sinks onto the couch beside her before Luke manages to resituate his train of thought.

She smiles, a real one, and says, "I'm okay guys, I was a bit of a mess earlier but Reggie had my back." She nudges his shoulder playfully and pointedly ignores the silent eye conversation the boys are having over her head.

Apparently, they come to the conclusion it's better not to ask, and Luke grins at her, squeezing between Alex and her on the couch, ignoring Alex's indignant "Hey!".

" You guys will never guess what sick club Alex and I found, and I think we could totally jag a gig!"

Julie briefly clasps her hand with the one still fiddling with her bracelets, and grins up at the beside her, before letting him get back to his fidgeting while they both listen to Luke's extravagant tale of massive a massive crowd and a gig that could take their band to the next level.

She's warm and comfortable with her boys, her band, her family.  
The music is a part of her, and her Mom, well her Mom is a part of her too.

**Author's Note:**

> I rlly went from never publishing my fics to publishing two in one day! 
> 
> I love Julie but Main Character Reggie seems to come to life in everything a write, I hope you enjoy it regardless. 
> 
> I just Love They!!!!


End file.
